All the memories of deeds gone by...

Today has been a day when 'all the memories of deeds gone by, rise within me and thy power defy.' It is very difficult to live with a converted addict – whether their poison is alcohol, slot machines, drugs or sex. Sin that has been forgiven still has power and the enemy will do everything it can to use memories of the past to inflict misery and pain in the present.

With me this happens in two ways:

First of all I find myself re-running mental recordings of all the wicked things I've done in my life (this usually happens when I'm lying in bed or standing in the street selling the War Cry!) The enemy urges me to focus on the stupidity of my actions and on the pain they caused others.

Secondly, he uses innocent events to resurrect feelings of mistrust in those I love. For example, I may be late home one night and unable to contact Tracey (or maybe just not think to call) and then the enemy puts all kinds of ideas into her mind "where is he?" – "what is he up to?"

The first method of attack I can (through the grace of God) deal with by following the advice of Paul and "whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." Spiritual warfare also quickly sends the enemy scurrying!

The second method of attack is more difficult to counter and requires a great deal of discernment and wisdom – the truth is that even now I can fully understand why trust is so difficult – because I am, like all sinners, always only one decision away from disaster.

Praise God – time heals!

Praise God – 'love covers a multitude of sins!'

Praise God – 'we are more than conquerors through him who loved us'

"He breaks the power of canceled sin,

He sets the prisoner free;

His blood can make the foulest clean,

His blood avails for me."

Today's bible readings: Hosea 8:1 to 9:17, Proverbs 17:25-18:5, Romans 8:1-17

"Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death." (v1&2)

"You, however, are controlled not by the sinful nature but by the Spirit, if the Spirit of God lives in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he does not belong to Christ. But if Christ is in you, your body is dead because of sin, yet your spirit is alive because of righteousness. And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit, who lives in you." (v9-11)

"For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father." The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children. Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory." (v15-17)

Grace and peace, A